Some of the key elements in your Christian dating ad which you may not have thought of, but are crucially important are; (and you will be judged on these points by your audience)
Is he articulate? Is she original?
Is she educated? Is he charming?
Is he interesting? Is she witty?
Is she courteous? Is he outgoing?
Finally – Is he willing to put forth some effort in his ad to win me?
As you can see there is much information to be gleaned from an ad you place. The way you write will tell who you are!
How you write your ad will make the difference between-
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As we have just seen it’s not what you say about yourself and your desires that will tell her about you. The ad composition itself will spell out who you are. Better to put your best literary foot forward to make a positive statement about just exactly who you are. It’s easy if you follow our great Christian Personal Ad Tutorial!
1. First things first, let’s begin with the picture. Women are not visually stimulated in the way men are, so seductive is not the key. You must be well groomed and approachable. Look into the camera. Looking away will make you seem aloof. Use inviting body language. Smile, and bear your neck dimple. (Where the collar bone meets the neck) Military uniforms and business suits (ties) cover this area for a reason. We cover this vulnerable area so as not to portray vulnerability. In your personal ad you want vulnerability. Remember you are targeting women. For a more in depth overview of inviting body language see the section on body language in the Christian Dating 101 primer on the site map.
2. Salutations – According to Parade magazine a simple Hi! is a great opener. no one expects you to open with complicated greetings. This is just the ice breaker.
3. Personal introduction – Give your name and or nickname if you wish.
4. Biographical information – Start out with an opener which will grab her attention and reach into her heart. Appeal to her emotionally. Women are emotionally centered. Make her have to read your ad! After this stage give her just the facts. This directness shows strength and confidence. Both are qualities which women need. These qualities trump all others.
Be honest and avoid the heartbreak of separation caused by dishonesty. Maybe she would rather have a plumber than the CEO of Microsoft after all! Let her know your faith. Women love conviction in a man.
This is your Christian dating bio, so include what you wish. Items usually mentioned are; age, occupation, marriage history and children, race, place of birth, where you live, favorite foods, entertainment preferences, hobbies, music tastes, favorite Christian songs and books, and Bible verses.
Finally, give her some tangible asset about yourself to make her want you. No boasting. Put it in such a way that you do not seem arrogant. Put it something like – I’ve been told that I have a great sense of humor or that I’m a great cook.
5. Your desires. Now that you have told them you know who you are, tell them you know what you want. Do you want a down to earth gal? Say so. The divas will be repelled and the woman who appreciates it most will answer your call. Be descriptive and to the point!
6. Conclusion – Now that you have told her who you are and what you want, paint a picture of what your lives would be like together. Something romantically appealing works wonders. In case you haven’t noticed women love romance. Woo her. Be careful in your invitation not to use negative or conditional words like – if you are the one. Instead of this use – you are the one I would love to warm up by the fire with. She will know when you are speaking to her, if she is the one. Use these final words to make her feel like a kindred soul.
1. Salutation – Short, polite. Hi! or Hello, whatever best suits who you are.
2. Descriptive adjectives – Positive and powerful superlatives which will enhance her imagery experience and build curiosity. Let your zest for life and love infect her through your description. This is all she has to go by at this point.
3. Spelling and grammar – Look intelligent, educated, and thoughtful.! Consult a spell check or dictionary and correct errors. We are not all English professors, so perhaps you have a trusted friend who will help you formulate a correct and appealing ad. If you can do it all on your own then it is usually a good idea to have someone critique your writing.
4. Warm text – Use key words that stimulate emotion. Words such as fun, romance, love, happiness, and feel give a warmth to your writing and will give her a positive reading experience. Again, this will give her a little insight as to what life with you might be like.
5. Courtesy – Don’t use harsh language or slang. You will want to come across in a Christian dating forum as polite. Let your faith speak in the genteel tones of your words. Keep your eye on the ball, remember you are appealing to Christian women.
We realize that there is a trend of extremism out there that feels the need to shock. This is even more prevalent online than in public since there is no authority to keep people like that in check. She will appreciate you even more for being a gentleman online. We stress this point which to most just seems like common sense because this is what gets the best results.