Before we return to our subject, loneliness (for Christian singles), let’s look at those peculiar people who thrive on being alone. I call these curmudgeons “Hermits”, and more power to them if they really prefer being isolated:
“I would rather sit on a pumpkin and have it all to myself than be crowded on a velvet cushion.” Henry David Thoreau
Thoreau also mused, “I love to be alone. I have never found a companion that was so companionable as solitude.”
A crusty hermit from yesteryear, Thoreau may never have gotten the recognition and love he wanted so he decided he didn’t need it. Loners throughout history have retreated from society as they have experienced disillusionment and hurt, real or perceived, from people who have not fulfilled the loner’s needs.
Recluses have learned to be detached from their feelings, to “live inside their heads”; to fill their waking hours with ideas, dreams, activities, hobbies, reading, and who knows what else, since they never invite anyone in to see for themselves! But one advantage hermits have over lonely people who long for intimate friendships, is the fact that they know how to fill their day with numerous projects, many unfinished, so they always have “something to keep themselves busy”, a worthwhile way to prevent boredom. Recluses are usually pack rats, and have drawers and boxes stuffed with materials and ideas that await their attention. Actually, the world is better, for the gifts and zealous work some reclusive and semi-reclusive souls have brought forth in solitude.
But I digress. Our purpose here is to bring MORE people into your life, not to retreat from them. Consider this gem, penned by an unknown author:
“We read, to know that we are not alone.”
It’s very true and insightful. When we read books (or even internet Christian dating fodder for thought, such as this!…But, hey, it’s free, right?) it connects us with a real human, the author, and reminds us that we are not alone, on many levels. We share feelings, we see into another’s soul. Our minds are engaged, identifying with the protagonist, discovering new insights, and best of all, learning new ways to enrich our lives from someone who has gone before us, making our path straight and far more effortless. And strangely enough, unlike reading a book, reading this online literally joins us in cyberspace with people who are reading it at the same time. Therefore, none of us is alone at this moment.